Today, when my husband, who is going through orientation at his new job, was asked if anyone present was from a different country, he raised his hand. And when the speaker called on him and asked what country he was from, he responded: Texas.
If you know Chris at all, this comes as no surprise. Everyone laughed and he was called Texas for the rest of the day, much to his amusement. If you know Chris, it will also come as no surprise that he was fairly adamant that we have a Texas marriage license.
So, we got married. In Lubbock, Texas. A little over a month ago. Even up until a week before, I wasn’t sure where we would end up getting married at or when, but it finally happened.
We’ve received so much advice over the past six months of engagement, advice about relationships, being married, running a household, loving each other, raising babies, everything. And we’ve honestly loved it. We like hearing what has worked and not worked for other people, we like hearing about the trials and errors, the ups and downs, the good and the bad because we know we’re going to encounter it all too.
We did pre-marital counseling with a pastor friend of mine and it helped us so much. I would highly recommend it to any couples looking to get married. It started us thinking on a lot of different subjects that we hadn’t really gotten around to thinking about just yet. It was excellent.
However, that pastor friend went on an excursion to Alaska in early June and I was getting a bit impatient, so we found a preacher in Lubbock who would marry us on a moment’s notice. I had prayed a lot in the previous weeks about who to have marry us and where to get married and when the pieces fell into place, I knew it was the answer I’d been looking for.
Chris and I neither one had met this man before, but he asked to have lunch with us on the day of our wedding to talk things over with us. He talked to us about the spiritual implications of marriage, about how it is the representation of the perfect Love that Christ gives to the church, how our roles in our marriage will be the thing that reflects Christ’s love the most to each other in our lives and about how long lasting and life giving our marriage would be. He talked to us about challenges and victories that marriage will inevitably bring. But the thing that struck me most was when he talked to us about choices.
In his words, he told Chris: “when you met Brittney, there was no spotlight shining down on her, saying she was the one you had to marry, you made a choice to pursue her. And, same for Brittney, she made that choice for you as well.” He continued to say that marriage would require choices from us. Love and attraction are there, but would wax and wane. It’s the choices that we make, the daily choices: the choice to love, the choice to pursue, the choice to stay married, to tough it out when life gets hard, that would hold us together.
And that’s what marriage is. It’s a choice. Chris chose me. Among many other mate and life choices he could’ve made, he put me first. And I chose him. Among a lot of other choices I had, I chose to commit to him, to make him my life mate.
That funny, loyal, true blue, Texan to the core. That’s who I choose. Over and over again.